The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
