You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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