How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he thought i was a dude.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize