I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
