Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
