I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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