Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
