I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
