Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
