so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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