i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize