Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
