I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
