Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
