just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize
