My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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