The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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