Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
not ubering you a puppy
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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