their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
