He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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