we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
