What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
4 words: hood of his car
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
