come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Text me some of your sweat
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