I want to make a zoo with you.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
