if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
