The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I wish I only lived at night.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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