So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
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