i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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