i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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