So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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