I'm sorry my penis didn't work
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
