making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
