Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just come out here and I will go home with you...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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