Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
