Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
