yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize