Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
she pinky promised me she was 18
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
