im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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