i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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