I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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