I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
