did you get engaged???
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
