glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize