Three words: puerto rican gang bang
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Vodka?
Forever.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
