So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize