smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
she pinky promised me she was 18
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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