I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
