I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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