i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize