if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
